People Go And People Wait

We didn't get the house. The house was already under contract, which we learned yesterday afternoon. Justin and I are doing our best to trust God that He has a better house and a better plan for us. I am very much struggling with the trust right now because my heart is a bit broken. However, I do know that He is in control; I just don't particularly like the direction His control is steering us. Which is normal for me. I fight Him quite often, though He is always right.

There's not a lot to report in the world of Justin and Leslie. Justin is already at work, loving on autistic children and serving people in an undeniably loving manner, and I am about to close my computer and step into a warm shower to prepare myself for a day of serving others and learning how to better trust God.

Stay warm all!

Listening To: Rufus Wainwright - Spotlight on Christmas
Thinking Of: What awaits me today

Oh, The Possibilities

Justin and I met with a realtor this afternoon. The house we planned to see (and did see) was a house that would be a perfect project for "Flip That House." We, however, are not perfect contestants for that show.

There just happened to be another house for sale on the same street, and this house, while in need of some work, is not a perfect project for "Flip That House." Instead, it could quite possibly be the perfect house for Justin and I to call our first home. That is as long as God says okay and gives us the blessing to make an offer on the house, an offer that is about 15% under the asking price. Then we'll just have to trust that God will take care of all the details we can't wrap our minds around.

Right now, we just have to trust, and trust we will. And while we trust, I will trust you all to look at some pictures of the house and fall just as in love with the home as Justin and I did this afternoon.

Ones Who Entertain And Ones Who Observe

We attended a class from 9:30am until 2:30pm today. The class was titled "The Way", and it was put on by the church we have been visiting for the past several weeks, Frontline Church. 

Justin and I have been consistently moved by the sermons at Frontline Church. When I say moved, I mean that we have felt as though the words being spoken were Truth. I do not mean that the sermons made us feel good or gave us goosebumps. While I am not stating that those things are bad, I want to clarify what I mean by the statement that the sermons moved us.

After the class "The Way", Justin and I planned on beginning the official task of house hunting. We were scheduled to meet with a realtor to see a house in the Paseo District of Oklahoma City. About 20 minutes prior to our scheduled meeting time, however, our realtor called and said that she did not have the code to get into the house. We're hoping to see the house tomorrow, and we're hoping to possibly stumble on a few open houses tomorrow afternoon.

Life is moving quickly for us, and it's exciting to think of how many changes might await us in the coming days. It's also exciting to watch the number of presents increase under our Christmas tree and to think of the first married Christmas we have to look forward to.

Like A Splash Of Water To My Face

My friend Emily recently tagged my blog as fabulous and provided me with a "your blog is fabulous" award. There is a catch to her compliment, and that catch is that I need to list five fabulous addictions as well as tag five other people as having fabulous blogs.

I can easily compile a list of five fabulous addictions, since I have far too many addictions. It might be difficult to tag five other people, but I will do my best. Who knows if they will see the tag or not.

1. Ugg Sweater Boots

Obviously, Ugg Sweater Boots are something that I find fabulous to wear. Justin does not wear Ugg Sweater Boots, so I am not 100% clear on whether or not he finds them fabulous. To me they are fabulous for many reasons. First, they are warm, and I enjoy almost anything that provides me warmth during the cold winter, especially since I am doing my best to keep the heater off as much as possible. Second, the boots look amazing with dresses and leggings/tights or with jeans, and that alone makes me love Ugg Sweater Boots.

2. Gossip Girl

If you were at our reception on September 13, 2008 and stayed for the toasts, you were able to hear my best friend and roommate from college explain that I have an obsession with television. She also listed several of the shows I am a fan of, such as The Hills, One Tree Hill, Gossip Girl, and Grey's Anatomy. And she informed all of the guests still at our reception that Justin now enjoys watching Gossip Girl. I am sure he appreciated this, and I am sure he appreciates that I am writing this for all of the Internet to read. Dan & Serena, forever!

3. Christmas

I used to love Christmas because I loved getting stuff. To be honest, I still love the idea of getting stuff, though it is much harder for me to think of what I want for the holidays in comparison to the lengthy lists I used to make. This year, Justin and I will be spending our first Christmas together, ever. Obviously it will be our first married Christmas. We have small budgets set for each other, and we are planning on spending more money on adopting a family who would be unable to have Christmas without our help. I may have put the Christmas tree up over a week prior to Thanksgiving, and I may have begun listening to Christmas music a week prior to Thanksgiving. However, it truly began to feel like Christmas when I bean thinking about providing for others.

4. Starbucks

I love Starbucks. I am certifiably obsessed with the way soy milk enhances an already delicious vanilla latte. I love how coffee warms me from the inside out. I love that when Christmas begins to approach Starbucks celebrating by offering even more overpriced Christmas flavored drinks. I just do not love how expensive Starbucks tends to be; if it were cheaper, I might be able to swing purchasing it on a daily basis. As Real Simple, Real Life on TLC pointed out, I could save $100 a month by not purchasing a coffee drink on a daily basis.

5. Marriage

Its odd to put marriage down as an obsession since I was against the idea of marriage for so long, but now that I am married to someone I fully intend to spend the rest of my life with (unless Edward Cullen from Twilight comes to life and realizes he loves Leslie and not Bella), I love marriage. I love falling asleep next to someone each and every night. I love laughing with him on a daily basis. I love cuddling on the couch and watching television. I love making decisions with someone else. I love having someone to cook for, instead of just myself, and I love waiting for the next season of my life with another by my side.

And I tag all the girls at The5Spot, Elizabeth, Ree, Sara, and Jen.

Listening To: Kate Voegle - Only Fooling Myself

Deciding: Whether or not to work out at home this morning or to go to the gym following work.

Good And Evil Against My Chest

Justin and I both have a strong faith in God, and we have both felt our faith in God waiver during different periods of our lives. I can't speak for Justin, but I can say that there have been times when I have strongly questioned God's presence in my life. I've known that God existed for quite some time. I even stopped denying His existence in high school. However, I've always felt that He didn't exist in my life the way He did in others lives. I always decided there was nothing I could do to fix this fact because I felt as though I had already done everything and received nothing from my efforts.

On Sunday, Justin and I attended the church we are considering making our home church, Frontline Church in the heart of downtown Oklahoma City. Pastor Dave chose this Sunday to preach on what we do to stand in the way of God' full and amazing power. There were 6 things, and I wrote them down on a piece of paper that is currently stuffed in one of my purses. While I can't remember all 6 things, I do clearly remember thinking "holy crap, I am totally guilty of doing all those things...whoops?"

I spent time last night reading Genesis, in my attempt to hopefully read the entire Bible in 365 days, and then praying. And today, my prayers were answered in a way I did not expect. While I can't go into the details of how the prayer was answered, I can say that I am blown away by God's ability to leave me speechless and practically in (joyful) tears while sitting in my cubicle at work.

There have been so many times in the past when I have felt as though there was so much more out there for me. And I still feel that way. I can also recognize that I stood in my way in the past and that I am still currently standing in my way. I'm just stubborn enough, though, that I don't usually want to change my ways until God takes a 2x4 and whacks me upside the head. Usually, the whacks hurt and leave a huge lump. This time, the whack was wonderful and has left me with a goofy smile.

What this comes down to, I guess, is simple. God is showing me that I need to stop planning so much. While I know He doesn't want me to walk through life blindly, He does want me to let go of all my plans and ideas and need to be in control. I know this to be a fact because the place I am at in my life right now is a place I, honestly, never wanted to be in.

I planned to move far away from the southern region of the United States. I planned to reside in New York City or Los Angeles or Chicago or Paris or Beijing or some other equally amazing and gigantic city. I planned to never marry, at least not before I turned 30. I planned to teach. I planned.. a lot of things.

Instead, I stayed in Oklahoma City. I married right out of college, at the age of 23, after knowing the man for (not even) 12 months. I'm not a teacher. The salary I make at my current job is much smaller than I planned for or hoped for. Still, the job I have is one I feel is a perfect fit, a little ironic gift from God that tells me He has a better plan for my life than I could have imagined.

And all of this makes me realize how in control He is. It also makes me realize that He will continue to bless me as well as my husband and my marriage. And while it will be difficult to give up my oh so careful planning for the future, as well as some of my materialistic desires, I know it will be worth it.

Listening To: Alli Rogers - Eden

Reading: Text message from Justin - "Cool! I'm getting off at 9." 

A Roller Coaster Kind Of Rush

It's 2:45pm on a Sunday afternoon. The heater is turned up to 80 degrees, and Justin left for work almost 20 minutes ago. We enjoyed a game of Scrabble (which I won), lunch at Jason's Deli, and an insightful, thought provoking sermon at Frontline Church prior to his leaving for work.

Days like today when Justin works the afternoon/evening shift and I stay at home can sometimes be the most stressful as it feels as though we are trying to cram a whole day into just half a day. And in other ways, the days are the least stressful because they allow us time to just rest instead of running around.

Today should provide me with a chance to vacuum the apartment, organize the living room and possibly the playroom, and to enjoy the comfort that comes from resting on the couch and reading. I get so caught up in the hustle and bustle so often that I forget just how wonderful it can be to spend the majority of an entire day (and even a weekend) at home instead of fighting the crowds at the mall or Target.

So much is changing in our lives that I'm discovering I truly need the weekends to recover. And while it is somewhat difficult to imagine our lives changing more than they already have by our getting married just 10 months after meeting, the change is fast approaching.

We're doing our best to save money and pay off debt so that we can soon afford to buy a home. We're both also adjusting to life as adults, complete with 40+ hour work weeks and pesky bills to pay. We're in the process of joining a church together and finding where exactly we fit in the church. It's exciting and exhausting, and we look forward to chronicling the changes (both exciting and not-so-exciting) here!

Listening To: Taylor Swift - The Way I Loved You

Reading: Amy Bloom - Away